girl seeking girl-friends

Jeans. definitely jeans. Long sleeved tee with a trendy scarf or sparkly tank with a cool jacket? Hmmm, boots or heels? I need to look good without overdoing it. Can’t look as if I’ve tried too hard …or like I’m desperate which I could be if I don’t manage to secure a social life of some kind here. I need to be me but kicked up a notch from what my casual attire affords me. Pretty yet approachable. Theres still time to try on some outfits and mix and match until it feels just right. Ugh – then there’s hair. My lack of products and tools presents a challenge but the slicked back pony tail is always a winner when dressed up with the right lipstick. Thats better.

With lashes extended and lips pursed I think I’m finally ready. Ready to meet…girls. Yes, girls. I’m venturing out into a new kind of scene. Much like the old dating scene I’ve thankfully and so gladly left far behind me. This time seeking girlfriends.

A true test in being vulnerable for sure. Putting myself “out there” and enjoying the adventure as so many back home have encouraged me to do (thank you dear friends!). The perception of this experience and the reality of actually living it, I must say, is far different. This is scary. My nerves are awry, I’m intimidated and
and quite frankly, I have no idea where the hell this place for happy hour is even at. I’m dizzy and once again feel as though I’m back to the basics of being a child. Like entering kindergarten and asking the pretty girl in class if she wants to be my friend. Only this time I’m 30. Its. Awkward.

Coffee is my consolation right now. My own form of liquid courage. The opportunistic side of me prevails. Barely. Sick to my stomach, I must decide this is ok. I’m pushing. Being uncomfortable is the only way to growth. I know this to my core and I want this to work. I need this to work. Being here and hey, maybe actually enjoying it. Deep breaths and a continual mantra of “I can do this” escorts me out the door.  The plan – arrive in time to grab a cosmo (I hope they have those here!), put on my best smile and say just say hello…

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